Monday, February 14, 2011

A Decade of Love

 Everybody finds love as the most magical thing on earth. In fact, Jojo said in her movie Aquamarine, “love is the closest thing we have to magic”. It’s the most beautiful line I’ve ever heard in a movie and I believe it, truly. The bible also says, from Corinthians chapter 13 verses 4-7 “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” How could somebody think of love as pain with all this thoughts? Love is never pain, its joy, its freedom.
I have this friend who possesses this great love for a woman for a very long time now. He loved this woman for more than a decade and never did he forget her even if he hasn’t seen her for the past ten years. Although he had relationships with other woman, this girl never left his heart. He has known this woman since they were kids, as little as he is, he learned to love this cute little girl and made her an inspiration to wake up in the morning and go to school. He loved her secretly. He made her his reason that if he won’t wake up, go to the bathroom, eat his breakfast and prepare for school, he would not have the chance to see her for that very day. Everyday that he sees her is a gift for him, everyday that he sees her and loving her secretly is the most joyful moments of his life. They were called to be the love team during their elementary years, and even if it hurts him because he knew that this girl would not mind it, it is still the most joyful experience.
            As little as he is, he learned that love is patient. He also learned that love is letting go. Elementary years were over and he has to let go of this girl. They have to go to different schools. No matter how hard for him to see her go, he has to accept it, he tried to make crushes with some other high school chick and tried his very best to let go of her. Then college days came and he was used to not seeing her. He had this quite life, sometimes cried for other girls, and loved some. But everything was a failure. He never had a good relationship, until he graduated college. Another relationship came but still, he loses the battle. All those years he can still remember how he lived his life with the memories of his first love. All those years that passed, he never tried to find her because he knows he has to live a different life. He wants to live again without looking at the past for those are already waste for him.
            Silence came again. He wants to have a new relationship. He prayed a lot and begged God to give him a woman who will fill the emptiness of his life. And no matter how he prayed for another face, he still can see her in his mind. Her face was never forgotten, even a single chance, he never did or maybe because he just can’t. He didn’t mind and continued to pray for he knows that she is already a history.
            God answered his prayer. He had this love and was very happy. He has given all his heart for his woman and gave her his world. He learned to love his woman very much and little did he know, still he tried to find his first love, he researched and found her. And because he wants to be faithful with his present love, he closes his door. He gave all her love to his woman yet he still fails the relationship.  He was left behind without knowing the reason. He was left empty and hanging. And despite all this, he was never mad. He prayed for strength and encouragement to love again just like the first time. He told himself that he will never loss the only thing that is left for him. That is Love.
          The time he decided to stand again, he tried to find his first love. He found her and they had conversations. That was the greatest moments of his life. “This is never expected” he said. They both enjoyed their time together and found out that they wanted each other so much. Everyday they had much more conversations until they fell in love. “This is a dream come true, and I never thought this would really happen” he said. They spend good times together and were very happy. Until sadness came around their world. The girl had a feeling of uncontentment. She felt that she doesn’t want that relationship and that questions his mind. She wanted to find herself and wants to be alone. My friend doesn’t want to let her go because he knew it will ruin his world, for all he knows that this woman is the face of his first love who had been his life for the past 10 years. Yet, the girl still chooses to leave and he can’t do anything but to let her go even if it breaks his heart.  It was his greatest downfall, left by the one he knows could make his world turning. He said “although she’s gone, that decade of love will always remain and will have more decades to remain. And even if I will find someone to replace her in my world, still she will remain inside occupying a part of me that has always been her place. I will let her go now and will treasure this scar that she had left me, for this scar will always remind me of her face and a battle never won”.

Pain? no it's not. It’s love for there is freedom, it's love for there is acceptance. It’s not pain because no matter how cruel it is to have that fate, he still chooses to love, and that love will forever remain keeping him standing no matter what. 

People would say it's painful because they focus on the harder parts of being in love. But Love is never pain, it's just a matter of accepting the trials. Although its hard, love will never stop there, love continues because we are all destined to love, we all live because of love. Love is our own soul, it gives us life, it make us breathe. If it is pain, its not love anymore, it's just part of it. A part that you choose to have, a part people forget to understand that it is only a choice you'll make. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.

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